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t1ritter
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Name: Ben
Country: United States
State: Illinois
Birthday: 12/14/1988
Gender: Male
Interests: Computers, video games, video game design, gymnastics, soccer, pizza.
Expertise: Playing video games, playing soccer, and eating pizza.
Occupation: Student
Message: message meEmail: email me
Website: visit my website
Member Since:
11/23/2005
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| These files were painstakingly stolen from a high security vault. To see the secret files in their entirety, click the link below.
Stolen Files
Coming to a theater near you.
The following has been rated R for explicit and graphical content.
Viewer discretion is advised.
This document catalogs the events that took place from Midnight, December 3rd, 2009 to 7 am of the same day. It details the trials and tribulations of the explorer known only to the public as "Ben" and the mysteries of the lost Zihulo Tribe.
These were officially classified as court documents and had never been revealed. Their existence has been a closely guarded secret. The highest government echelons have worked hard to make sure no one ever even remembered them. No one was ever even aware of their existence...
until now.
---The Lost Papers of the Fourth Expedition---
12:05 am---------
Just got done from working on a group assignment for about 8 hours solid. Didn't get it completely done, but we had to turn it in anyways. I have no snacks or drinks to help me make it through the night.
I expect delirium to set in shortly.
12:37 am------------
Dangit. I DID NOT put the potted plant back here. I swear. I wish it would at least stop spitting on me.
Still at lot of people here. I expect around two be down around 15 or less. Just the hardcore. After that it should drop off to 5 pretty quick.
My bloody ear! Stop spitting on me. Dang potted plants.
1:05 am------------
Strangely and inexplicably, a small jungle has begin to grow here in the lab. There are vines growing on almost every wall, plants cover the desks, and the pillars have been replaced with trees. What was the door is now a cave. I have to stay at my post, but I do wonder what is really going on?
And if I hear one more word out of this potted plant it will taste the sweet fury of my foot.
1:44 am-----------
Monkey howls woke me up. It's been a while since I got lost in this jungle. It won't let me fall asleep either. And it's kept me afraid to sleep. I'm afraid of what will happen if I close my eyes for too long. I'm afraid of what this potted plant will do. Twice now I've caught it trying to creep off into the night. Twice! But not again, not again.
It's time to move on. If I wait here much longer the ovals will get me. Darn you ovals! Always jealous of all the other circles... I'll outrun their wobbly pace tonight. Then I'll be long gone... long gone...
1:54 am---------
Something jumped up in front of me as I was running. He looked strange, made weird noises with his mouth. I believe it was a form of communication. After a short while I was able to understand his speech. His name was "Jeehyon". I couldn't understand much but it was clear we had the same goal in mind. Fortunatly, I left a pair of bloomers down the trail a ways back to throw him off.
And now I continue through the jungle.
2:14 am-------
I finally did it. I walked through the stone cave. It almost seemed to follow me where ever I went. On the other side... I found something... something fantastic... A crystal of the purest green. It actually glowed in the cave, illuminating the dark. Carved all around it were esoteric symbols like WTF, OMFG, GTFO, and others. I hope to discern their meaning one day.
But that crystal.... I wanted to much to reach out and take, but for some reason, part of me resisted. When I finally left, I was glad I hadn't touched it. I found ancient carvings, definitely in the style of the lost Zihulo tribe. They were worn, but seemed to say they believed the crystal to be a form of deity. It would hover over the heads of those it chose, controlling them. It was up to the crystal to decide the fate of every being. For some it chose happiness, for others...
I must continue my search.
2:51 am------------
Curses! That blasted pot has wandered off. I'm sure its bound to be trouble sooner or later. For know I must continue on alone. There are few signs of life now, though more than I had expected. I managed to find a Samich tree that had some ripe Samich fruit on it. I've also decided to stop carrying this monkey on my back. It can use a car just like everyone else.
I then spent 28 minutes considering the effectiveness of using farmville in a pickup line.
3:19 am-----------
It is not very useful.
3:50 am----------
It's been 3 weeks since I entered the jungle. Eight days since my traitorous potted plant left. Seven since the monkey took the jaguar and wrote a country song. I've traced the carpet all the way back to its source. It's here, somewhere in these mountains where I'll find the last remnants of the lost Zihulo tribe. I've already found some of their weapons and tools. One is a smiley face head with orange hair that makes noise when you push his head down. The others...
Well, the others are too horrible to mention.
I must push on.
4:02 am--------
I didn't know they had ski slopes here.
4:18 am--------
Continuing to lose energy as I climb higher into the mountains. Mythos says they hid themselves in a secret glade in the mountains during times of trial. I've had to take to eating nuts to survive. I'm using the Zihulo's Divine Arkhem Hammer of the Gods that I found to break them open.
Plus every fourth or fifth nut I crack with it turns into a pigeon.
4:46 am-------
Very sleepy. Typing slower. Moving slower. Purple Dragons. Breathing slower. Standing up to stay awake. Need to find... Potted Plant.
5:12 am--------
The clouds methought would open and show riches ready to drop upon me that, when I waked, I cried to dream again.
I want a mountain dew.
5:48 am-------
I... have spent a wondrous month in the presence of the lost Zihulo tribe. Their religion, math, biology, sciences, all astound me! I have learned things I would have never thought possible! And all because of an attack.
I was attacked one night in the mountains by a swarm of trash cans. It was led by none other than the Potted Plant. Now its true intentions are known. I will never give it a band-aid again. Know that it's true colors have been shown. And it's not pink either.
too many zebras in here to concentrate. I'll write more later. First I have to iron this saddle so I can hear better.
6:24 am---------
At last, I draw this tale to a close. I wandered out of the mountains, taking my time to follow a light stream through the soft plains, until at last I reached a small village.
This entire story has all been a setup for this.
I hadn't forgotten yet my Potted Plant. I talked with the townsfolk and managed to learn where I was. I was happy when I found an old man who could speak english. I walked up to him and said,
"Have you seen my pot?"
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No other explorer has ever found any trace of the lost Zihulo tribe. The explorer Ben's fantastic accounts are all we have to go by. No one has ever found the paradise mentioned in the secret documents. At least, no one has ever found it and returned to tell the tale...
THE END??
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| Find the full uncensored document at
the classified archives.
!!The following posts are rated R for violence, language, and sexuality by the Motion Picture Ratings Board of America!!
WARNING: DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME.
What follows are the events that took place between November 30th 2009, 11 pm and December 1st 2009, 7 am. No other surviving copy of this document exists in the public domain. Since it was published the government has done a good job of covering up the actual events that transpired that night.
Here, is their true account.
11:31 pm----------
I haven't left for the library yet. I'm still working in my room and listening to music. Right now its "Make Her Say" by Kid Cudi. I plan to leave here around 1 am and pick up some snacks before heading over to the library for me 2 am shift.
12:13 am------------
It's tuesday now. I'm starting to get a bit sleepy. I just heard a sound come from downstairs. When I went down to investigate, nothing happened, nor could I determine for sure what made the sound. It sounded almost like "35G89&$^^#" with a little tink on the end. Am I being followed?
12:52 am------------
Getting ready to leave. Minor hallucinations have set in. Fortunately no false grandeurs of power yet. I'm still awesome.
Noticed some people camping out outside with binoculars. Must be some weird hunting season. I considered trying to fly, but dismissed the idea because then I'd have nowhere to park my car. Next post will be from Milner Library.
1:49 am-----------
Arrrived at Milner Library. Surprising amounts of natural life. Expected much more of a dead planet. The natural fauna are strange creatures. They are surprisingly focused, not giving in to fear or shyness at my approach. They seem to have attached themselves to the flora that covers the area. I am unable to determine if they are feeding off the plants or if it serves some other purpose. They are using their appendages to interact with parts of the glowing flower. I can hear a series of clicks and taps from each creature across the area. Perhaps this is some form of mating ritual? I will try to learn more.
Quite tired now. considering if the lack of sleep might be interfering with my judgment, but this is too pivotal of a discovery to wait. If I wait until I'm rested they might run away. I will continue my research.
2:09 am-----------
The curious creatures have resisted my efforts to study them. They allow me to get quite close to them but seem to sense that they are being watched and turn to look at me. As I continue my observation they grow increasingly more uncomfortable. I wonder if perhaps in their primitive culture their current actions are shaming and intended to be done alone and unobserved. Perhaps it is some form of bodily excretion? I must understand these rules if I am to become part of their inner culture. Who knows what secrets I might unlock?
Fascinating! One of the creatures disattached itself from its flora and came near to me. It then showed its teeth began to make a series of whoops and grunts, as if trying to communicate. I held my gun steadily aimed at its chest, just in case, but I tried to respond in a non threatening way. Alas, he ran away. Still, this marks my first one-on-one with one of these creatures. They are non smart, and their well kept teeth remind me of dentists... I believe I shall call them, stupiddentists. Or pehaps a combination of the two... stu-dents. Yes, students. I must take one back with me when I leave, for study. Perhaps a female.
2:36 am-----------------
Ate a candy bar.
And it was good.
Had a small adventure.
Also realized that carpet bombing is not an efficient technique for rescuing princesses.
She will be missed.
3:06 am---------------
I didn't put that potted plant there. It wasn't me, it was someone else. I know better. I only use the rubber girders. They give extra support and strength. I like orange juice.
3:25 am------------------
I just made 5 bucks.
(somebody asked if they could touch my legs)
3:51 am-----------------
Just realized clothes are a form of control put forth by the man. The situation is dealt with summarily.
4:04 am-----------------
The rest of the library did not respond with the enthusiasm I had hoped for. The cops are another of the man's forms of control. So are hand cuffs.
And just to reiterate, the potted plant is not mine. It belongs to someone else. I'm just watching it for him.
4:23 am----------------
Know what time it is? Poetry time!
Roses are red, violets are blue
That's what they say, but it just isn't true
Roses are red, and apples are, too
But violets are violet, violets aren't blue
An orange is orange, but Greenland's not green
A pinky's not pink, so what does it mean?
To call something blue when it's not, we defile it
But what the heck, it's hard to rhyme violet.
4:42 am------------
Addendum.
Requiem for a Lamb:
Mary had a little lamb
With mint jelly.
Thank you.
5:21 am------------
It's quiet.
Too quiet.
And lonely.
And cold.
And dark...
5:56 am----------
I don't how long I've been down here. I've lost track of time. All I know is that I'm close, so close achieving my goal. If I can only hold these invaders off. Every since that earthquake they've been trying to fight their way in here. I'm not sure how much longer I can hold out against this ALIEN INVASION. Perhaps, just 1 more hour.
6:28 am---------
I've managed to form a sort of resistance here in the library. Currently, we're holed up in the computer lab, but were about to go on the offensive. We can't take many more attacks. Hopefully we'll catch the aliens off guard and I'll be able to kill their leader, Zanthar.
6:44 am---------
We've had to change our planes. I can't believe what we're about to try. It's time for our attack. My history remember us fondly and forgive us for what we are about to do. This is Ben, signing off.
----------------
Ben and the others who spent that fateful night at Milner Library were never heard from again, nor was there any trace of the aliens come morning. Any evidence that was left has since been swiffed away by the FBI, CIA, and Homeland Investigation. This document is the only surviving record of what happened that night.
Perhaps we'll never know the truth...
THE END???
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| Check the volcanoes! Make sure they haven't frozen over.
I just stumbled across this a bit ago and couldn't help but find it interesting, and true and needed in some ways.
For those of you who aren't hip-hop fans, an rapper who goes by Young Jeezy has a song named "Put On". Here's the link.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9bHUE41uZlM
You'll notice something interesting. The flag shown doesn't have red, white, and blue. It only has black and silver (or black and gray). The video (though not the lyrics to my sense) is about how the recession is hitting what we quantify and ignore as "the lower class." In the video, it focuses on black people.
Out of curiosity I looked around online a bit for a clear definition about the flag. I'll post the words of the author below. It's short, but seems to hit on something. Watch the video then come back and check this out.
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Black and Silver Flag:
A symbol of the recession, people taking a stand against the gas prices, unemployment rate, foreclosures.
Hip-Hop addressing Political Issues .
The black and sliver is a call for change.
It isn't defacing the flag, it is just a protest against the current political leaders. it also is a Plea for more black leaders in the government.
Dark times that many communities in america are going through right now.
Also of unity showing that no matter how hard times can get, you can still turn to each other for support.
We've been poor, we have BEEN ready for this. We live this. We will get through this. That is what the black and silver flag means.
It means that the government has us in the dark. The flag has no color. Black/White, we all suffer the same. | | |
| This is a short excerpt written by Jessy Ribordy about his new project, "The River Empires."
I really liked it and it's not like I\m posting too much stuff on here so here ya go. enjoy.
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Welcome to the ordinary world. You see a summer home amongst magnificent woodlands. Off in the west, sounds of waves splashing against the cliffs. You see a family arriving and unpacking for a long stay. Two young lovers preparing for their wedding, surrounded by family and friends, the Northland sunset, strings of lights, and of course, enduring love. The activities are joyous yet bustling, and a breeze shivers the leaves and flirts with the wind chimes near the porch. Then your attention slowly turns to a young girl, with big brown eyes and sandy ringlets, her white summer dress treads and whispers. She is fixated ahead. From out of the woods enters a young boy, ruddy and bright eyed. They embrace. The longest, sweetest grasp, pure from the snares and confusion of the world, always remembered yet forgotten in a flicker. The two, apart for the year, will now spend the summer together, as was every time former. You are amazed and entranced with these two. Your mind wanders, imagining past adventures the children had, as they grew with each other in wonder, friendship, and now love. The girl's family is aware. They pass by with smiles, yet they remain apart from the blooms of mysterious light these two children share when they gaze into each others eyes. You are here, in Northland this summer. You are witnessing the ordinary world. There is a very special reason that you are blessed to view the adventures this particular summer. There is a very special reason that I have decided to narrate with song. You are about to embark on an adventure amongst the looming trees and warm evening glow. A journey of the final summer for Hayden and River. This is the ordinary world. This begins the onset for a tale called The River Empires. | | |
| I need to start posting more often. The thing is, nobody really reads stuff on here anymore, so I feel very little incentive to do so.
Plus Im lazy. Like, really super lazy.
In fact, I'm so lazy I'm going to end this post already.
Without even having a proper conclusi
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